


194 Days

by NeverNever



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Arranged Marriage, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-25
Updated: 2015-01-25
Packaged: 2018-03-09 01:18:27
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,588
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3230768
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NeverNever/pseuds/NeverNever
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>194 days after what happened in the garden.<br/>Sequel to<br/><a href="http://archiveofourown.org/works/3073427/chapters/6669872.html">Into the Fire</a></p>
            </blockquote>





	194 Days

**Author's Note:**

> This is a sequel to [Into the Fire](http://archiveofourown.org/works/3073427/chapters/6669872.html) it does not work as a stand alone, so please read the other first.  
> Not beta read - all mistakes are my own. Feedback very welcome. I don't do romance very well, so I sort of ran out of ideas in the end. Also, I'm prettys sure I butchered a lot of mythology - very sorry - hopefully, it isn't too painful.

 

On the 3rd day, Thor spent breakfast and lunch watching Loki eat with great intensity as if he were the most riveting of entertainments.

At supper, Loki broke the tense observation. “What is it Thor?”

“I am attempting to learn of your preferences during meals.” Thor explained with gravity “It would appear you are inclined to the honeyed bread- you enjoy jam on your cheese” Thor made a face. “You seem to favor the braised Sæhrímnir – I have yet to see you eat the smoked trout.” He points a finger at the fish a mere breathe away from Loki’s hand.

Loki stared - agape- at the golden head besides him – he observed all that in merely three meals? The grape he was about to eat paused in midair – he looked at it.

“What do you favor the most?” Thor asked, clear blue eyes resting intently on him.

“Rock ptarmigan.” Loki muttered as he finally brought the grape to his mouth.

Thor made a slightly disgusted face, “Those vile little birds that live in the mountains?”

Loki glared at him over his goblet and Thor looked contrite. “I am sorry – they do not look very delicious.”

*-*-*

 

On the 12th day, Thor asked Loki to stand with him at court.

“We shall be receiving the Dwarven Ambassadors this day.” Thor said, as he stood with Loki at the great library. “I should like to present you to the realms-” Thor blushed faintly as he put a heavy hand on Loki’s shoulder “Would you do me the honor?”

This was the first time Thor had requested his presence in public – never had Loki been invited to dine nor share in royal duties, it made him a little breathless. Thor wanted it to be known – to show a consort at court was to make known the _importance_ of that consort.

It made joy flutter inside Loki- and this time- it did not fade so quickly.

When Thor led them back to the chambers, Loki could see – atop the bed laid a breastplate of gold and silver – it was bold – powerful – the finest Asgardian craftsmanship. Beside it- were shoulder plates made from the same gold and silver metal- and in the reflected light, Loki could see the complex and exquisite engraved patterns.

Eyes wide, Loki turned to face Thor slowly – his cheeks burned as Thor smiled faintly.

“I had the armory fashion these for you—” Thor lifted the breastplate from the bed – “may I?”

He gestured at Loki.

He wanted to clad Loki himself – cautiously – Loki nodded- aware of Thor’s every moment.

The strong hands pressed the cold, smoothing metal over his tunic- it fit perfectly. He felt the brush of Thor’s powerful fingers, pressing the armor into place, tightening the small buckles at his sides.

Then came the shoulder plate – Thor gentle settled the weightless metal over Loki – careful to brush away strands of hair. With graceful movements – the Thunderer straightened Loki’s cape and glazed at him.

“Does it suit me well?” Loki asked tentative- it was the first time he had been in Asgardian armor- it felt strange to be clad as an Aesir, however fitting.

“Yes.” Thor breathed “You look – you look like a warrior – like a prince.” His hands pressed softly around Loki’s neck, fingers stroking gently over the exposed flesh.

Loki could see the desire in the stormy blue eyes – _too soon_.

Thor gazed at him a moment longer, before taking him in arm as they walked towards the throne room.

 

*-*-*

 

On the 26th day, Loki had found himself being pulled after Thor to the stables.

“Come –.” Thor had burst into the bed chamber with great excitement.

“Thor – you must be clear – to where shall we be headed?” Loki followed quickly – though Thor’s hand clasped rightly around his wrist did not give room for anything but.

“You shall see –” Thor directed him to a great black steed- then paused – sudden realization upon his face. “Do you ride?” he turned suddenly.

Loki regarded him steadily – “Yes, Thor have you forgotten how we arrived at the palace?”

“Ah! Yes.” Thor beamed and took a step back to let Loki mount.

A short ride later saw them dismounting at a garden gate – Loki’s breath caught in his chest.

Unbelieving – he looked to Thor – who having perceived Loki’s expression – nodded.

_The garden of Idunn._

The bright Asgardian sun seem to shine more brightly here – all around, Loki could see the shimmer of sun light, the dense clusters of trees as he and Thor walked along the well-worn path.

“Thor,” Loki dared out speak loudly – lest he perturbed the serenity of the garden. “Have we the right to be in this place?”

“Of course!” Thor’s voice boomed over Loki’s – “Lady Idunn favors me greatly – I have requested her permission to bring you.”

The thought of Thor having _planned_ this –

They walked a short way in silence – Loki was enchanted by the green of the trees – the song of birds in the distance – the smell. The garden smelled so fresh, crisp – so _alive_.

When they stopped before the tree of Golden Apples – Loki was rendered truly breathless. He had expected no less greatness from it – it awed Loki. It glowed with such life and light as to make every other living thing around it look lifeless – dull – barren.

The tree was heavy with fruit – each branch drooped slightly under the weight of the apples – yet none fell to the ground. There was no rotten fruit – not a sign of decay.

“Take this.” Thor was holding out a golden apple – _how had he gotten it?_

With the greatest care – Loki plucked the apple from Thor’s palm – scared he might bruise the precious fruit if he were too careless. Thor smiled – “Eat it.”

_The Golden Apple_

“I cannot – it is too precious.”

“Nonsense -” Thor deep baritone resounded through the garden “- I shall bring you one each time you desire it!”

The apple was ripe and juicy as Loki finally bit into it; it’s sweetness as light as a midsummer breeze.

 

*-*-*

On the 41st day, Thor and Loki sat intently in the war room ad they bent over the trading maps.

“Nidavellir has made their requests.” Thor sighed – “Trade with them is crucial to our weaponry-”

“We shall meet their demands” Loki said simply, eyes intent on Thor.

It was not the first time Thor had come to Loki for console since that fateful day- yet Loki still felt unsure. The new Thor was still alien to Loki, he could not be sure of his reactions. Though Thor has been nothing but gentle and courteous – Loki cannot push away the fear whenever he spoke over Thor – or whenever they disagreed. He found himself still hesitating at times before forcing himself to speak openly, honestly when questioned. Though the fear of Thor had begun to fade – the solid ice which has sat in this chest for many months did not melt as quickly.

“Then we must ride for Muspelheim.” Thor conceded – “On the morrow.”

Loki nodded. “We must act quickly – Muspelheim does not stand with the Aesir – we may not be at war, but if we trespass carelessly into their land.”

“I shall go – you shall accompany me.” Thor said sternly.

“I?” Loki raised an eyebrow. “Do you forget I am _no warrior_ husband?” The mockery was open and dangerous. Loki focused on Thor’s reaction.

But the Thunderer only laughed lightly, “You are more skillful than most – you are fully aware Loki – I would have your magic with me on this venture.”

“Do you trust me with your life?” Loki stared at Thor’s face fixedly.

Thor hesitated – he looked at Loki with a slightly trace of doubt- “Do you mean to say I should not?”

“I merely asked you if you would trust me with your life – I do not trust you with mine.”

The reluctance was gone from Thor’s face – in its stead- Loki could see anguish. “I – I do not know.”

Loki smiled – “Bring Warriors Three.”

 

*-*-*

On the 57th day, Thor presented Loki with a spear. It was slim and light – intricate golden patterns on its handle.

At the point, two golden blades curved upwards, and in between a small gem glowed.

“A gift from the Dwarves.” Thor said as he handed Loki the weapon.

Loki could scarcely contain his joy, it was beautiful – he ran a loving hand along its golden handle, taking in the smallest detail – the lightest engraving.

“It was a sign of their agreement –”

“Is it not customary for the gift to be given to the King rather than his consort?” Loki was still lovingly stroking the staff, a delicate finger tracing over the pointed blades.

Thor looked diffident. “They had offered me a gift – I refused – I wanted you to have your own weapon, I already possess Mjölnir.”

Loki hummed softly; a swell of pleasure warmed him. All of this would have been unthinkable a mere few months ago – Thor’s selflessness surprised Loki still. Thor’s willingness to bend for Loki’s pleasure – _it is still unthinkable._

 

*-*-*

On the 62nd day, Loki sparred with Thor.

“Do not hold back – do you think me _weak_?” Loki taunted as he made another jab at Thor’s side.

“No – I simply do not want to injure you.” Thor dodged to his right and connected a kick all too softly against Loki’s leg.

“Do you think yourself _able_? To _injure_ me- should I not allow it?” Loki laughed as he brought his own leg to land a resounding kick against Thor’s knee which knocked him into a kneeling position.

“I’d rather not find out.” Thor said as he pushed back to his feet.

“You would insult me in this fashion? By treating me like the _runt_ you think I am?” Loki’s words came sharp with anger.

“No!” Thor cried out. “Why must you insist I injure you in this way?”

“Because _I do not think_ you can.” Loki’s elbow connected harshly against Thor’s jaw. He could feel the bone shift under his bow. Thor grunted and looked at him through pain filled eyes – Loki did not allow him time for recovery – instead, he swung his body around and landed a fist directly on Thor’s sternum – forcing the breath from him.

“Loki.” Thor gasped – before Loki swept his legs from under him.

“Weak.” Loki spat – he was deliberately provoking Thor with his words now. _Thread lightly._

With a deep intake of breath, Thor give a roar and charged at Loki – face flushed with evident anger.

Smirk firm upon his mouth – Loki dodged.

It did not take long to discover who the winner of their sparring was. Thor laid flat on his back in the courtyard dirt as Loki loomed over him.

“I- I should have known.” Thor panted – his face now ruddy from excursion as Loki gazed down at him.

“Do you admit defeat?”

“Yes.” Thor sighed heavily; face twisting into a grimace of pain as he tried to stand.

“Maybe you shall triumph next time-“Loki teased and held out a hand.

 

*-*-*

On the 78th day,

Thor and Loki set out for Alfheimr.

Alfheimr, land of the elves was as beautiful as Loki had imagined – the pictures he had been in books.

“Thor Odinson, King of Asgard.” The deep baritone of the High Elven king greeted them at the entrance of the Elven king’s halls.

“Ingwe, High King of the Elves.” They inclined their heads lightly at one another. “May I present my consort, Loki of Jötunheimr.” Thor gestured a hand at Loki.

“Your Majesty.” Loki bowed deeply at the waist.

“Ah. So it is true.” Ingwe looked at Loki with brilliant frost green eyes. “The sorcerer I have heard much talk of.” The green eyes flashed with something Loki could not place.

The palace itself was immense, made of high columns and smooth stone. Loki could feel the strum of magic in its walls - the strum of magic in the air.

The feast which had been laid for them was grand fair. Loki – never one for game and drink- delighted in the usual abundance of fruits and leafy greens.

Thor looked slightly disconcerted at the food laid for him, but he hid it well behind a mask of neutrality.

The feast carried on in a wholly different manner than those of Asgard, there was no smashing, singing, or dancing. As they ate and conversed, Loki noticed the closeness of the Elven King, his long gleaming hair brushed against Loki’s arm as he leant in close to explain each of the fruit present.

Ingwe wished to know about Loki’s magic, and Loki in return wanted to know the magic of the elves. It had been such a long time since he could speak of these things to another- especially one with more knowledge then he, he sorely missed the depth of conversation – the hours slipped by silently- unnoticed by Loki.

 

*-*-*

 

On the 83rd day, Loki and Thor fought.

Ever since their return from Alfeimr, Thor had behaved strangely, Loki had not noticed at first – when he realized it – Thor was sulking. For the life of him, he could not discover why. The days dragged on as Thor spoke little to nothing to Loki, refused to spar with him in the courtyard and broke one of the tables in the hall when Fandral invited Loki to ride with him and Warriors Three.

When it became evident Thor would not speak of his own accord – Loki acted. He cornered Thor after supper in the war room.

“Thor.” Loki felt a twist of anxiety in his belly. It made Loki nervous still to approach Thor in this fashion.

Thor merely grunted, refusing to look up from the map.

“Thor.” Voice louder, sterner – the fear in his chest grew.

Blue eyes met his – still silent.

“What is troubling you?”

“It is of no consequence.” Thor glanced away. It was his telltale sign. Loki pushed the desire to retreat to the safety of his own room’s down- deep down.

“Thor – you have sulked for 5 days – tell me what is troubling you.”

“I do not sulk.” Thor’s voice was tainted by anger. Loki fought the desperate urge to flee – instead he walked closer and tentatively placed a hand on the nape of Thor’s neck – hoping to reassure him.

“Speak to me Thor, converse with me so I may help you.”

“You never conversed with me before – why do you not seek more pleasant company than I?” Thor spat as he shook Loki’s hand from him.

More pleasant company? When had Loki ever –

“What is your meaning Thor?” Loki’s voice was cold.

“I mean- you would much prefer the conversation of others – I offer you no such _riveting_ subjects.” Thor stood to move from Loki.

“Speak plainly Thor – I have no patience for your games.” The hot rage mingled with the frozen fear was barely chocking him. It took every ounce of strength for Loki to continue.

“No – no patience for this –” Thor huffed.

And then it hit Loki – Ingwe – was Thor referring to Ingwe?

“Thor – are you speaking of the feast at Alfheimr?”

Silence – Thor attentions were firmly focused on city below the balcony.

“Are you envious because I spoke to the High Elf King?” Loki stepped closer, his own emotions now dangerously close to the surface.

Thor must have heard the strain in Loki’s voice – he turned “I had never seen you so animated- so alive as when you conversed with him.” Thor sounded hurt. “You never spoke to me in such a manner.”

“And pray tell my husband – when have you given me a chance for such?” Loki’s words were made to cut. “How is it that I am to speak to you about _magic_ when the first time I showed you my magic – you called me a _coward_?”

Loki was steps from Thor now, his anger buzzing like angry hornets within him.

Thor winced. “But I – I have changed.”

“Are you that dull?” Loki’s forced through clenched teeth. “Do you expect me to forget such _slights_ \- such _injuries_ as you have made against me?”

Thor looked confounded, like he had never thought of such a thing.

“What is your knowledge of magic Thor?”

“I – I have none- but I can learn – if you only told me.”

“What harm did my conversation with Ingwe bring you?”

“I did not like seeing him so close to you – he held your attention – I” Loki did not allow him to finish.

“Were you jealous because I gave my attentions to another?”

“Yes.” Thor breathed.

“Like you gave yours to those servants girls? Vanir maidens? _Sif_?” Loki was spitting with rage.

Thor gaped at him – speechless.

“Yes- did you think me _so dim_ to not know?” Loki’s gaze bore into Thor – intense – angry – he dared Thor to speak.

It was Thor who gave in first, his eyes pulling away from Loki’s.

“I – I suppose – perhaps –”

“Have I ever given you reason to question my loyalty?” Loki interrupted.

“No. There has never been that question.” Thor admitted – seemingly to himself.

“Well. There shan´t be reasons now.” Anger still coiling white hot in his chest, Loki turned and left.

 

 

 

 

*-*-*

On the 98th day, Loki woke at dawn to the hum of festivity- he glanced around drowsily as Thor knocked on his bed chamber door.

“Good morning –” Thor smiled brightly – he was already dressed, Loki’s brown furrowed in puzzlement.

“Why have you arisen before me?” He looked outside. “It is barely dawn – has something happened?”

Thor’s smile grew wilder as he sat on Loki’s bed. “It is Harvest End! Day for mead and food, drinking, singing- dancing.”

Thor beamed at him- the golden countenance made Loki’s insides twitch and his stomach knotted as happiness fought with anger.

Loki fell back on the bed – eyes closing again. “Is there to be celebration?”

“Yes!” Thor replied, enthusiasm bursting from every breath. “From dawn to dusk – we shall drink, eat – make merry.”

_All day?_

Loki was not overjoyed with spending an entire day surrounded by drunks. _Drunken Thor_. A stir of something like fear roused in his chest – Loki let it linger before pushing it down again – _let it be a reminder._

Thor was leaning closer to Loki’s half a sleep form, one hand gently smoothing down Loki’s chest. It made him stir –a faint rush of blood pool between his legs. Fiercely, he willed himself to remember who was touching him – remember – _it is too early to trust._

The warmth of the room and the gentleness of Thor’s touch made his senses dull. He should push the hand away – raise from the bed – dress. But the pleasure was too great, being touched in such a manner – Loki could not remember the last time he felt so relaxed –

The pleasure swelled as Thor’s hand roamed his chest; he could feel the strength of the fingers through the thin silk tunic he wore.

Thor was not oblivious to Loki – his breathing becoming heavier as his hands roamed south, coming to a stop just above the waistband of Loki’s bottoms. A thumb traced over the sliver of flesh exposed – “Loki-” He breathed – Loki could feel his own want – his skin burned where Thor touched him.

“Loki – allow me.” Thor’s hand did not move. It lay as a heavy weight against Loki’s skin.

“No.” Loki opened his eyes, hands moving to push away Thor’s. “I will not lay with you.” He lifted him and twisted out of under Thor’s touch.

“That is not of importance – allow me to – to pleasure you.” Thor’s cheeks were flushed as he looked at Loki.

One eye brow raised Loki almost laughed. “Please me?” The thought of laying with Thor made him hot and cold inside –burning anger and cold fear– but Thor pleasing him? It was laughable – when had selfish Thor been able to please –

But desire and curiosity got the best of him. “Go on.” He gestured carelessly- eyes never moving from Thor’s face.

“Though- I should give you fair warning –” A right bolt of magic shot from Loki’s fingers into thin air – it crackled ominously before giving a small burst of explosion. He smirked at Thor, whose face got redder by the moment.

Then Thor’s mouth was on him – covering the hard flesh with his soft mouth. The world fell away to the burning pleasure- the wet and softness sucking him deep. The bliss coiled deep in his belly – hips twisted – the soft tongue relentless and eager. Loki found his hands twisted in Thor’s blonde hair – pulling – pushing as Thor’s hands clasped at his hips.

It was over too soon – with a choked gasp – Loki spilled himself on Thor’s tongue – he opened his eyes to watch the Thundered as he did. Cheeks flushed and lips swollen red, he watched as Thor licked him clean and covered him once again with the silk pants.

Through boneless satisfaction Loki watched Thor – “Was that – did you-?” Thor seemed a child eager for approval – through the haze of pleasure Loki could feel that spark again.

Loki could feel the unspoken apology.

He nodded and extended a hand to Thor – “Help me dress.”

 

*-*-*

On the 104th day, Thor returned from his hunting trip with Warriors Three, though he had invited Loki – he did not remain behind when Loki refused.

The day was once again clear and cool as Loki read on the balcony, in a distance; he could hear the galloping of hooves and the booming voices.

 _Such commotion_ – it must be Thor.

Slowing the horses to a trot as they approached the Palace entry, Thor raised his voice.

“Loki.” There was a certain cheer in his voice.

Loki peered over the top of his book, expecting nothing other than a unduly excited Thor – still high from the hunt. Loki could see Thor waving, something clasped in his large hands.

“I have bought these for you.” Thor bellowed up to the balcony as he held up his hand – Loki could see it now- _rock ptarmigans –_ six or so hung from a rope as Thor proudly beamed.

Thor remembered. He had gone hunting for them.

Fandral laughed “The fool almost fell from the peaks trying to spear them.”

“And then one defecated on him.” Hogun snorted.

Volstragg was doubted over in laughter “He almost brought down the mountain – smashing it with Mjölnir - convinced the birds – the birds would be frightened and jump from the cliffs.”

Thor scowled at them, before turning back to Loki. “I shall have the cook prepare them for supper.”

Loki found the spark within that had nothing to do with anger and rage grow.

 

*-*-*

On the 138nd day, Loki and Thor returned from Niflheimr after an exhausting three days. A visit to Hel was never pleasant, it drained their souls – made their bones wary of life – it sapped their courage, their will right from their marrow.

Loki collapsed exhausted onto of the bedding, without the energy to even remove him filthy clothes and boots. The magic he had spent in the last three days had been taxing. But negotiations must be had – The King of Asgard – must be seen.

It had not stopped the rouge forces from attacking them however, and Loki had spent much of his magic fighting, and when Fandral had been injured, Loki’s last bit of magic had gone to reattaching his arm.

So thus he lay, his head spinning as bursts of pain spiked through his veins – he felt heavy, unable to move.

When he awoke what could only be hours later, he found Thor quietly entering the room, not any cleaner than himself and far less rested.

When the Thunderer noticed Loki’s consciousness, he paused. “I only meant to see how you faired.” He said quietly.

“I am only tired,” Loki breathed softly.

“You have spent much of your magic.” Thor was looking at him with great worry on his face. Even after so many days, Loki cannot help but feel unease at an expression which had been so wholly unfamiliar to his husband’s face.

“I only require sleep – and food.” Loki made an effort to sit – only to fall back unto the bed.

When he awoke the second time, he was cleaner. His face and hands were free of dirt, his boots had been removed together with his cloak, his breastplate and shoulder plates lay on a chair nearby.

Loki heard the soft sound of breathing, _Thor_.

The Thunderer was sprawled on the bed besides him, blonde hair a disarray of tangles and braids. He had not removed his own boots or cloak.

Loki let himself enjoy the peaceful silence for a few moments, in these rare times – Loki could almost believe Thor had become better after all. If the last few months were proof at all, Loki might not be doomed after all.

Loki let himself lie back on the soft bed, and let the gentle breathing of the warm body besides him lull him to sleep.

 

*-*-*

On the 152nd day, Frigga summoned for Loki, he had been sparring with Thor, who had finally overcome his inhibitions about fighting Loki. Thor promptly assumed a fearful countenance when the messenger came- and thus Loki went to see the All-mother; face streaked with dirt and wearing armor.

Frigga’s warm smiled welcomed him as he bowed into her rooms, a lavish table had been set for two, and Loki sat nervously as Frigga gestured to a chair.

They sat in a moment of silence, Friggas all-knowing gaze resting upon him, and Loki could not help shifting slightly in his seat.

“I see you are well.” It was Frigga who spoke first.

“Yes, Your Majesty.” Loki felt the tension creep up his spine and settle over his shoulders.

“Do not look so apprehensive Loki, I merely wish to speak to you about recent events.” She poured mead for them both.

Loki swallowed thickly. What would he say if she were to inquire about Thor- which she would surely do. Tell her the truth; there is nothing to hide any longer –

“I have observed a betterment of the relationship between you and Thor.” Her bright eyes studied him.

“Yes- it has improved a great deal, Your Majesty.” Loki attempted to blanket his nervousness by drinking.

“And how has that led you to feel?”

“I do not know yet. I fear-” Loki paused – he realized he was speaking truthfully, Thor may have changed a great deal, but Loki did not. He still held a deep reservation when it came to Thor. Though Thor had not lifted a finger nor uttered an unkind word to him since that day in Svartálfaheimr- Loki did not trust him. Every morning, he woke to the fear that the Thor he had known would come back and this, this new and sun-kissed figure from him life would be snatched away.

He dared not allow himself to become attached to the kindness, to the brilliant smiling eyes – because deep within him, there was the coldness, the ice which had splintered into a thousand shards of pain served as a constant reminder.

 

Frigga nodded. “Time. It is the healer of all wounds.”

Loki _wanted_ to believe her.

 

*-*-*

On the 167th day, Thor celebrates his name day.

Asgard itself vibrates with joy and cheer. At every tavern, there were songs that sang praises of their golden king. The streets were adorned with banners, Mjölnir and the crest of Odin splashed across in bright gold and red.

The palace itself hummed from dawn with activity, all around, Loki could hear the servants rushing for the nights feast. Honored guests and ambassadors paid homage to Thor in the throne room.

Loki stood silently beside Thor, dressed in the finest robe of green and gold – while Thor sat in the throne. As the afternoon grew into evening, the ground besides Thor grew ever fuller with gifts.

There were jewels wrought from the finest minerals, delicacies Loki had no names for, swords and handsomely made weapons which gleamed in the setting sun light. There was even a horse, a beautiful sliver maned creature the Elves had brought with them.

Loki had spent many nights thinking about what he would give Thor. Would does one give the king of Asgard? Loki had contemplated on books – Thor does not read. He thought about weapons – Thor had every Amory at his command. When Loki had finally decided upon his gift to Thor, he was not sure it was a good decision.

_But it was all he could give._

And thus they stood on the balcony, Thor overlooking the well-lit city below him. Everywhere, lights could still be seen, voices could still be heard – cheering and dancing. Thor’s features were open and soft, blue eyes smiling as he listened to the merriment of his kingdom.

“Thor.” Loki set a hand on Thor’s shoulder.

Bright blue eyes turned to rest upon him, the fact that they did not turn cold and hard still made Loki’s breath catch.

“I have a gift for you.” Loki said as Thor turned to face him.

The expression on his husband’s face was one of genuine surprise.

“You should not have. I di-” Loki did not allow him to finish, both hands clasped in Thor’s hair, Loki pulled the Thunderer to him, clashing their mouths together – the force of it sent a shot of pleasure up his spine.

It must have surprised Thor as well, he stumbled a step – crashing hard into Loki who unable to support the full force of it crashed backwards and found himself pinned against the wall.

Thor’s mouth was hungry on his, eagerly consuming him. Loki could feel an arm around his waist, pulling him closer – tighter against the larger body. Another wound itself around his neck, holding him still while the hot mouth pressed against his plundered and took. Loki felt his head spin, the shock of Thor’s eagerness made him burn.

When Thor finally pulled away, they were both breathless – Thor’s pupils were blown wide with pleasure, his mouth red and wet – there was a flush upon his cheeks. Loki wondered what he looked like.

 

*-*-*

On the 188th day, Loki made Thor drop a pitcher of mead.

They had been at high table having supper – there was cheer in the air as they had received news of the arrival of a new Prince Vanaheim.

“Do you like children?” Loki had not known what possessed him to ask.

Thor was downing the last drags of his goblet. “Of course. Children are delightful, they run, they play – they bring such amusement to a sometimes dull life.”

“Do you desire father children?” Loki wished he could still his tongue.

“I will have need of an heir – though I shall think on it when it time arrives -” Thor contemplates Loki with what seems to be sadness. “Do not think this is an insult –since I wed you I know not how…”

Loki briefly wonders if the All-Father had never taught Thor anything about the other races.

“Thor.” Loki said carefully. “I can bear children.”

The pitcher Thor had been pouring from fell and spilled mead all over the table and Thor.

“You can what?” Thor’s head had snapped around sharply to face him.

“I can bear children. “Loki repeated slowly as if speaking to a dim child.

“But you are male.” Thor’s eyes racked over him as if he might have missed something.

“I am Jötunn.”

A servant had rushed up to clean the mess from the table and Thor’s tunic. Loki waited patiently as Thor gaped at him open mouthed.

“Then – all those times – when we lay together…” Thor looked as he was having a hard time wrapping his mind around this idea. “You could have caught?”

“Yes.” Loki did not like to remember. “Though I made sure I did not.” A child born from those encounters would have been a child he could not love – could not look upon.

Thor seemed to have understood, nevertheless – sadness had crept into his features.

“I would like to have children.” He regards Loki steadily. “I am not in a place to force such an act upon you – but know that any child you bear – any child from you – from our union, I would love.”

It dawned on Loki that Thor had thought he did not conceive in fear Thor would treat the child as a mixed blood- _impure_ – not Aesir.

A heavy hand caressed his cheek. “I am sorry. Always, I am sorry. For having thought of you any less than what you truly deserved.”

Loki almost believed him.

*-*-*

On the 194th day, Loki found himself being closer than ever to believe Thor had changed.

Thor had been busy with royal duties that afternoon, unable to spar with Loki himself; he had bid Loki spar with the warriors in the courtyard, declaring any of them as strong as him.

Loki had watched the warriors, each strong and able – sweat beading on their brows as they threw themselves into the sparring as if it was a real battle.

There was one exceptional fighter, dark hair under his golden helm with strong and almost cruel features. He defeated his comrades one by one, besting them in all manners of combat.

He would suffice.

“What is your name, warrior?” Loki pointed at the brunet.

“I am Einar.” A hard voice.

“I would you spar with me.” Loki walked towards where Einar stood; the other fighters had retreated slightly from Loki’s presence. “Do you accept?”

There was a flicker of a sneer across the warriors face, it was brief and gone quickly – but Loki saw it. Loki recognized it. It was the sneer of one who felt distain for him – Jötunn.

“I accept. Though I beg for pardon from punishment – should I injure your person, _your majesty.”_

_Oh._

Loki smiled. “I grant you pardon. May those who are present be of witness.”

The spar had turned into a real fight before anyone took notice; Einar was evidently a formidable fighter – but his arrogance and dislike for Loki seeped through his very pours. It made him rash.

Loki bested him in the end, leaving the angry warrior sprawled on the courtyard floor heaving for breathe.

“You are a most skilled fighter. It was a pleasure to have your company.” Loki extended a hand.

The figure on the ground glared the extended offer. “I do not require _your assistance_.”

 _Jötunn_. Though unless, Loki could hear it.

The deep Aesir ideal.

Loki merely retracted his hand and turned to leave. It would not do any good to quarrel with one with such minded.

There was a mutter behind him. Loki caught a slur under the man’s breath; he spun around, the anger awaking in his belly.

“Care to repeat that?”

The warrior was on his feet, hard hateful eyes fixed on Loki.

“I require a rematch; I would not accept defeat for _you_.”

“And what would I be?” Loki inquired, magic burning through his fingers, aching for release.

The brown eyes held not a hint of hesitance. “ _Jötunn_ ”

What happened next was a sequence of anger spurred motions. Loki magic shot out of him before the other could speak another word. There were shouts around them. Einar moved, quick and agile.

The red haze of anger seem to cloak them both, it wasn’t until they heard the booming voice of Thor.

 _Thor_.

Loki dropped the frost blade he had been holding. He had fought one of Thor’s warriors, injured him. He had _fought_ Aesir – he…

The anger turned into sudden fear. The burning coals that burned in his chests become lumps of ice and dropped into his gut.

Loki could see Thor, red cape bellowing as he made his way towards them – the stiffness of Thor’s walk was the only indicator of his anger. The courtyard was silent, save for his and Einar’s hard panting. Loki could feel blood seeping through a wound on his thigh; his chest felt bruised and his head swam with pain. The other looked no better, just as bloodied and red faced.

“What is the meaning of this?” Thor made a crude gesture around the courtyard.

No one dared speak – even Loki could not form words. The fear had become so great it choked him.

“Well?” Thor’s booming voice made the weapon rack vibrate.

“We were sparring.” Loki begun.

“This is sparring? I had to be informed by the palace guards that my husband and a warrior of my battalion were causing destruction in the courtyard.” Thor’s eyes were cold; it made Loki’s stomach churn.

 _Destruction_.

Loki surveyed his surroundings, weapon racks had been tipped over, pieces of marble chipped from the walls and guardrails, and half of the ground had been covered in frost.

 _Frost_.

“You.” Thor pointed at Einar. “Report to the war room, I shall hear your explanation.”

The warrior bowed before all but scrambling away.

“You. Wait for me.” Loki could hear the strain in Thor’s voice.

 

Loki paced as he waited for Thor to return.

_He will not believe you._

Loki could feel his innards twist into knots of worry and fear as he paced through the bed chamber. Surely, Thor would let him speak; allow him to recount his side of the events. _Would he?_ Loki had intentionally fought with the aim to injure – kill – the one who insulted him. In his blind fury, he had failed to remember the consequences it would bear.

Inferior. Thor would never believe his word above one of his own warriors. _Aesir_.

It was making him sick; Loki could feel the bile burn his throat – the hot burn of fear and dread clawing its way up his chest.

When the door of the chamber finally banged open causing Loki to almost jump out of his own skin.

“I only meant to spar with him.” The words were out before he could stop them.

“I – Einar accepted –“

“Loki,-”

“-I bested him after the match-”

“-I have already heard the-”

“-it was after we have finished did he insult me-”

“– I have a full recount of the events from Einar and several of the others present-”

“- he _insulted_ me. I did not mean to attack him – you must believe me. I never-”

“I do believe you, the others present told me in truth of the events-”

“They will all defend Einar, he is their brethren, Thor you must…” Loki finally trailed off.

“I do believe you.” Thor was surprisingly closer. “I have heard the events from all who were present.”

Oh. The weight in Loki’s belly became heavier.

“You are not angry with me?” The words felt thick and dry.

“No.”

“But I harmed him. I used magic – I-” The fear made the words rush out in a panic.

“You were not in the wrong; he should not have behaved as he did.” Strong hands were resting lightly upon his shoulders.

“But I – but he – you do not begrudge me for injuring one of your own?”

Thor shook his head sadly, “It is not of importance. I know you acted in defense of yourself— not of menace or the likes.” Thor’s face was a mere touch away – almost touching.

And then Thor’s mouth was upon his, soft and tentative – allowing Loki the chance to pull away.

Loki was without words. Thor was not furious with him. He would not be punished – there would be no retribution.

The lack of anger on Thor’s face made Loki want to weep with relief and for the first time since that day in the garden, Loki _believed_ him.

 

*-*-*

 


End file.
